Patrick didn't know anything was off right away. When he arrived at Pete's house, it was the usual bombsite with clothes, notebooks, dishes and other random objects scattered across every available surface. Patrick was about to complain about the mess when he stumbled upon Pete in the kitchen.

This occurrence was not a rare one -- Pete often spent his time huddled over the coffee maker as if it were a shrine -- but whet was not normal was the various ingredients and cooking supplies spread out before a very focused Pete. He was making something. Something was definitely wrong.

"Pete?" Patrick asked hesitantly as he stepped over a stack of hoodies and into the kitchen.

Pete grinned at Patrick as he tried to subtly slip something behind his back. "Oh, hi! I didn't see you there."

Patrick looked around at the counters just to be sure he wasn't imagining things. "What are you doing in here?"

"Oh, you know," Pete said casually, "just trying out a new recipe I found. You should have some when I'm finished."

If the idea of Pete cooking wasn't suspicious, the smirk he was fighting most certainly was.

Patrick narrowed his eyes. "What are you up to?"

"Nothing!" Pete attempted wide, innocent eyes, but he only looked startled.

Patrick nodded slowly and started to turn away, but then struck out suddenly, grabbing the object from behind Pete's back. It was a cookbook. Upon closer observation, a cookbook entitled Natural Harvest: A Collection of Semen-Based Recipes

"Pete, that's..."

"Awesome?" Pete supplied. "Sexy?"

"I was going to say repulsive."

Pete laughed.